It is so difficult at times to fully live out of what our Heavenly Father thinks of us, rather than what those around us think of us. As a child of God, I am loved by a good, good Father, with all that entails – delight, amusement, holy pride, joy, forgiveness, warmth, concern, patience. And because of Christ’s life and work, my sin has been wiped away and all He sees is the redeemed me, the me I was meant to be and now always will be. No grudges, no disappointments, no shame or fear or unmet needs. Just love and joy and delight. When I live out of all of this, my heart is full, my joy is complete, and I am free to love others as He is loving me.
However, when I am living out of what those around me think of me, my heart is an exhausting roller coaster of ups and downs. For while they may seek to love as best they can, they see all of my sin, past and present, and assume it for the future. Failures may be forgiven but are never forgotten. They are full of their own needs, their own baggage, their own sin, which when mixed with my own it is a wonder that there are even brief moments in which joy and peace and fullness ever align. So why, O Lord, can I not simply be grateful for how I am loved by my Father, the King of the Universe, and live out of that? Why do I constantly seek the favor and approval of equally broken creatures, rather than basking in the warm love and acceptance of the Creator? May it be so, Father…may it be so. Amen.